• Dr. Sharon Livingston

When You’re in a Horror Movie, You Make Poor Decisions: Part 1

The other day, when I was preparing my morning coffee down at Manhattan Bagel, I caught a glimpse of a Geico ad that was entertaining but also had important implications for coaching.

If you haven’t seen it, you can watch it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYae3ZAAbLc

In a nutshell, a group of friends are being stalked by a Serial Killer. Terrified, they’re trying to figure out what to do, where to go.

Hide in the basement! Let’s jump in that running car!

No! Let’s hide behind that wall of chain saws . . .

The killer takes off his mask and shakes his head at their poor judgment.

The ad is funny but unfortunately there are lots of challenges and transitions in life that can make us feel like we’re living in a horror show.

The best horror stories help us understand something about ourselves. Zombies represent soulless response and toxic conformity. Vampires represent lust and morality gone astray. Monsters embody our worst fears that threaten to destroy our safety and way of life.

While these exaggerate to make a point, there are transitions in life that throw us into physical or emotional paralysis, just like the terrified characters in scary movies. Either you or someone you know has been there.

It’s very often about loss.

Losing a job

Losing one’s health

Going through a divorce

The death of someone you care about

Or it may be about a major change

Graduating school

Moving to a new place

A new career

Look at this list and I’ll bet you can find many that pertain to you even if you don’t realize they’re triggers for anxiety.

Significant Life Changes

· addictions

· bankruptcy

· career change

· change in religion

· changes in education

· children arrive

· children leave nest

· chronic pain

· confrontation with authority

· crime - perpetrator or victim

· death of one or more people close to you

· different cultures and customs

· divorce

· environmental shifts

· fall in love

· fame

· financial windfall

· illness

· injury

· loss of job or income

· major change in income

· major dietary changes

· marriage

· menopause

· mid life crisis

· natural and man-made disasters

· puberty

· overcoming victim hood and being 100% accountable for everything

· purpose - loss of

· relocation

· retirement

· suicide of someone close

· war, physical conflict

· become an entrepreneur

· become an employer

· being a leader instead of a follower

· move office out of or into home

· globalization

· major expansion or downsizing

· decentralization

· virtual workplace

· mergers and takeovers

And there are more that haven’t been mentioned that create upheaval in life.

But here’s the key realization. When we’re in the “horror” of the chaos caused by the change we make poor decisions.

Event plus Response = Outcome

It’s our response to the change that determines the results.

When acting without an outside perspective we often get ourselves in deeper trouble.

And no one’s to blame. It’s hard to be rational when thrown into chaos and confusion. We need others to help us sort it out, create new goals and plan a strategy to get the best result.

That’s why finding a great coach is so important. Someone who knows the challenge, has probably been through it too and has helped others to get to a good outcome.

No great athlete would consider training or competing without a coach.

I’ve personally worked with a series of coaches to help myself deal with changes and make new changes. Business coach, physical trainer, nutrition coach, time management coach, tango coach, writing coach, singing coach – well maybe that one wasn’t as successful as I wished.

I believe in getting an outside perspective so we can get the whole picture and fine tune our capabilities. It just makes sense. You can’t comb the back of your hair well without a mirror that allows you to see it.

Go out and find a great coach and if you’re having trouble want some suggestions I’m happy to help having trained 100’s of wonderful people with different specialties. More to come!


To your success!

Doc Sharon :)